FIRST, Tina said she excited to see you at that dinner tomorrow at her house and she told ME to tell YOU that you better not be bringing some cheap ass meat like salisbury steak or ground beef. She tell me to tell you that we shoul
d have AT LEAST a T-bone. Tina say she got all the condiments but if you want potatoes and vegetables then you better pick them up too. And she need some napkins. I don't know how she already go through that whole jumbo pack of napkins that Lulu stole from the restaurant and give to her. Tina probly use them for diapers on the baby. Oh, and if you want to drink anything you should probly pick it up on your way. Tina said she don't care if her jaw wired shut, she eatin them steaks. Oh, did I tell you? Tina want 2 steaks for herself. She don't stop with the steaks.SECOND, right before they let Tina out of the hospital today they put some new bandages on her head and they let her pick what color bandages she want to go home wearin and Tina say
she want pink! Tina's head all wrapped in pink bandages lookin like a walking cotton candy. She crazy. Anyway, she ain't got her whole face covered no more, the bandages is just wrapped around the top of her head like a turban and then the bandages wrap under her chin and up over her head, then her jaw all wired shut and then she STILL got that dick mark on her face. So she still look a little weird. And YES, they did (FINALLY!) shave that weave off her head. It in some hazardous waste garbage bag in the basement of the hospital. Her weave probly tryin to fight it's way out the bag. I'm just sayin that it's probly alright if you tell her it's cool that her head bandages match her braces but don't say she look like cotton candy.Don't forget, we leave for the inauguration on Sunday. AND REMEMBER...it ain't 72 degrees in Washington DC like it is here. I got sunburned today! I heard it's A LOT colder in A LOT of
places but I ain't sure cause I ain't seen the news cause I been outside enjoyin the weather. Tina scribbled on a napkin that she heard it's colder than freezing on the East Coast and that frozen things like lakes is gettin a extra layer of freeze. So bring socks! I'll see you at Tinas.
about with internal injuries cause Tina got a scar on her face the size and shape of Johnny Case's dick. That shit starts at her mouth and wraps right around the back of her head. And I ain't saying that Tina was suckin Johnny Cases dick when she hit that pot hole and then hit her head on the roof and then on the steering wheel, I'm just sayin that after the bandages came off she look like she had a indentation of Johnny Case's dick on her f
ace. And when Tina drink her dinner through a straw and sucks her cheeks in the dick do a little dance on her face. It's cute! I TOLD HER that you promised to be at her apartment on Saturday to be at her welcome home party and you'd bring them steaks we talked about before. Just make sure you don't make any Mummy jokes...she dont think they funny.
your neighbor's dog" right before you was supposed to go with me to the hospital to see Tina and then you "found" the dog right at the same time I got to the hospital. I ain't sayin it didn't happen, I'm just sayin. Anyway, Tina was pissed that you didn't come and I swear that if her jaw wasn't wired shut and she could open her mouth she would have bitched about you the whole time. I seen it in her eyes. You know how her eyes get! Even with all them bandages on her face you could still see her eyes and they was mad that you wasn't there. I TRIED tellin her about that "lost dog" but from what I could tell from her eyes, she didnt believe it either. All I know is there ain't NO WAY she goin to the inauguration with me cause she ain't even gettin her face bandages off til the 23rd! And I ain't gonna be showin up at the inauguration after parties with Tina all wrapped up, walkin around Washington DC like its Halloween. That's embarrassing. 
you picturin it right now, Tina wit no tounge! Mmmmmmmmm. Stop. That girl need her tounge to make her living. She lucky her teeth didnt bite right through it. She wrote me a note on a napkin that she wanna sue Shakey's brother. Tina wrote it right on the napkin...sue Shakey's brother...then she start tappin her pen real hard on it. TAP TAP TAP.....TAP TAP TAP... And I could TELL she was tappin out "SHOW AND TELL" cause she tapped the napkin three times each time she did it. She actin like her wildest dream came true and she can finally sue Shakey's brother for all he's worth. What kind of case is she gonna make out of that and what the fuck does she think she gonna get out of Shakey's brother? A car with no back windows? She don't stop, even all bandaged up.
others old piece of shit Cutlas so she could go see some friend way down San Bruno Ave and I don't know what kind of FRIEND she got way down San Bruno Ave but I THINK it got somethin to do with that shit she make in her basement. Anyway, Tina was drivin down San Bruno in Shakey's brothers car and she hit this big pothole. And YOU KNOW that old piece of Shakey shit Cutlas don't have no shocks, that car ain't had no shocks or back windows ever since he bought it. Well I guess when Tina hit that pothole her head
bounced up and hit roof of the car and then bounced back down and smacked the steering wheel and I think the combination of the two things is why Tina got her jaw wired shut now. All I know is Tina ain't going with me to the inaguration if her jaw is still wired shut cause I don't need everyone starin at us. And I want to drink when I'm there and I AIN'T drinkin with Tina if she taking pain killers AND drinkin her beer through a straw. Well I didnt have a chance to stop and see Tina at the hospital but Showcase did and Showcase said that most of Tinas injuries are Internal so it's not that
bad. And her head all wrapped like a mummy. And she said Tina almost bit her tounge off but I aint gonna start spreadin that around cause YOU KNOW how Showcase like to exagerate. Well I guess I got my wish from the other day when I say "Tina needs to learn to shut the fuck up". I'll meet you tomorrow and we'll go see her at the hospital.
re classes so now Tina won't be able to get her Good Parenting diploma and the state might SELL the baby. I mean I don't really fee
l sorry for Shirley cause if she an ass enough to think that she gonna get some money out of a unemployed bitch who lost her baby in the bar then she gotta learn her lesson. She lucky she only losin out on $40. Tina could lose the baby!! That's why I think that Tina should probaly go rip someone off and steal money out of their wallet the way she do while she suckin their dick 
and then pay Shirl the money so she'll keep goin to the classes. She gonna get a big tax deduction for the baby this year and it worth a lot more than $40. So she can't afford to lose the baby. Tina said that if she have another kid and it's a boy then she'll get three times the money on her taxes. Is that true? She said she want to have another baby before the end of the year. She don't stop.
ot she always get us in trouble. That's just Tina. But me and her was in the butter and cheese aisle and this BITCH with nasty frizzy grey hair walk by and I SEEN HER look Tina up and down and up and down and then she walk past us and she say "Someone a little OLD to be dressin like that." And YOU KNOW that Tina dont like to be told how to dress. So I turn to Tina and I say "You hear what that bitch just say?" But Tina DIDN'T hear what the bitch said and then she made me tell her what the bitch said and when I told her what the bitch said she freaked out the way you already thinkin she freaked out. Worse. Tina walked right across the aisle to the eggs and she threw a egg right at that bitches head and when the bitch turned around Tina just look at her and say "NOW WHAT?" AND I KNEW that from right at that second on, I was gonna be banned from the Safeway. Cause you know she don't just throw around "NOW WHAT?" I seen her break a bitches finger once after a "NOW WHAT?"
WELL, if you was stupid then I might have to tell you, but I know you ain't stupid so I don't even need to tell you that my hangover after the New Year parties make me feel like I got a big living room chair comin out my ass while that cheap ass fabric softener that Tina use is being pour
ed on my face and burning off my skin. You know what I mean! Like YOU was that ONE Halloween. I will drink with ANYONE, but I aint NEVER drinkin with Tina again cause it seem like everytime I do any drinkin with Tina I end up havin to apologize to a lot of people. Or pay a fine. And after I seen that I puke on that rug that I love I was SO MAD at Tina cause she know I can't eat spicy food after I drink anything blue. And she MADE US get them enchiladas. Anyway, I got my rug hanging outside my window right now to air out. And since it's so cold out that should kill most of the germs. Then I'll Fabreeze it. I'm just sayin, I was THAT sick and it's Tinas
fault.